Where Else Is That Showing Up?

I’m in a group called Men of Discomfort with a small group of about 10 men. We meet 6 days a week in a park in Orange County CA to workout, but the group is much more than that, and we venture into everything from diet to mindset to religion.

After a workout inevitably someone forgets their jacket or water bottle, and we send out a Marco Polo asking who forgot it. Whoever claims the forgotten item always gets hit with a question: “Where else is that showing up in your life?” It’s easy to brush this little nudge aside, but I’ve found that the truth is that a weakness somewhere always, as a rule, shows up somewhere else in your life.

I am probably the most guilty of forgetting items after a workout, so I’ve gotten into the habit of asking, “Where else is this showing up?” For me, I’ve found it shows up in me feeling scattered and unfocused. I spend way too much time thinking about the next thing on my to-do list. If I’m working out, I’m thinking about the work I need to do later this morning. When I’m in front of the computer doing the work, I’m thinking about lunch. While eating lunch, I’m thinking about later that night, you get the picture. For me, forgetting that water bottle at workout is a symptom of not living in the present. But checking yourself every time you notice a habit or behavior you don’t like with a quick “Where else is that showing up?” can be a game changer.

If you’re late to work or a meeting, where else is that showing up? You’re angry at another driver on the road, you miss a workout, you don’t follow that diet plan, hit them all with the question, where else is this showing up? I guarantee it’s showing up in multiple areas and affecting not just you, but family, friends and coworkers.

But here’s the good news, the reverse is also true. When you start getting that discipline into your life, that ALSO starts showing up everywhere. You got up at 6AM to workout, where else is that showing up? You focused and made time for your kids, you stuck with that diet, you put in that extra work in the office, you crushed that last set of squats, where is is THAT going to be showing up? When you fix one area of your life and get serious, I guarantee it’s going to make it’s way into all of the others, and that’s how you begin building a truly meaningful life, brick by brick.

Husband, Dad, Man of Discomfort, Fitness Enthusiast, Engineer